


One of These Nights

by Lunnashh



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-17
Updated: 2016-03-17
Packaged: 2018-05-27 05:47:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6272224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunnashh/pseuds/Lunnashh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even if it's only in your dreams, you wish to see him.</p><p>One of these nights.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One of These Nights

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired to write this after repeating Red Velvet's new song One of These Nights. Imo the mv is very beautiful & the song is growing on me^^
> 
> The sentences in italics are result of tweaking the song's lyrics.
> 
> Also  
> I'm  
> Sorry  
> /runs away

 

_You feel like you're in a dream, and everything else seems so faraway. You're disconnected from the rest of the world._

 

Changmin is radiating with pure happiness, smiling at you so so wide and grasping your hands so so tight.

"Of course I'd say yes," he says. He's never looked so sure.

"It suits you," you say, caressing the band around his ring finger. It's sterling silver adorned with rose gold and a diamond in the middle; it's so beautiful you know it deserves to be worn by Changmin.

"Thank you, Yunho," Changmin closes his eyes, holds you close in his arms.

Almost close enough to his heart.

 

_Goodbye, you say when he turns. And when you turn, you realize your way back home is now too far, too lost._

 

"I've always wanted a garden wedding. Or a beach wedding. Anything else but the stuffy, overcrowded ballroom," Changmin pillows his head on your shoulder, the two of you on yet another flight across the continent. The lights have long since dimmed but you can hear his smile in his dreamy sigh.

You remember Spain, where you both played around on the beach like children. You built sandcastles and collected seashells and you fell in love with Changmin all over again seeing his serene look under the sunset.

You remember Rome, with its majestic architectures. You saw the beautiful chapels and churches and dreamed of bringing Changmin there to tie the knot.

You remember Thailand, where you both move from one street food vendor to another and ended up with tummies full and hands full of miscellaneous things from the bazaar.

You remember Hawaii, where it's eternal summer and the flowers are colorful but nothing beats the radiant smile on his face.

You remember Japan, where too many things almost happened but now you're too late to fulfill those wishful thinkings.

 

_Even for just a minute, you want to stop time and exist with him in those miraculous moments, again and again and again._

 

"You look great," Changmin's reflection appears behind yours in the mirror, satisfied at the black suit he had wanted you to try on. He's got a white one on and you both look like chess pieces.

Together but always apart.

"Our wedding is going to be perfect," Changmin puts an arm around your shoulder and squeezes. His words make your insides twist, and then you are ashamed because you've dared to let those ugly _ugly_ feelings arise again.

"Are you nervous?" you ask, trying to hold it together because you can't ruin this.

"Yeah, there's so many things that still need to be done," Changmin takes a deep breath, exhales a bit shakily. "But I'm happy."

"Me too," you lie, because that's what you've always done all these years. To him, to everyone else, and mostly to yourself.

 

_Even for just a minute, you want to stay in his eyes, in his embrace. Before you part ways and there's no coming back._

 

"So this is it," you pat down Changmin's front and back, checking for stray lints and lingering dusts you know don't exist in the first place because Changmin looks perfect. His suit's been tailored to his slim body and he looks like an angel in all white. He's always been perfect, you think wistfully.

"Yeah," Changmin lets your hands linger on his shoulders, lets you bring him to an embrace, lets you kiss his temple one last time.

You almost, _almost_ ruin everything. Spill everything that's been festering inside you for all the time you've known him. You almost want to be selfish for once, to not care for the consequences and just tell him because it's killing you.

But you don't, because you don't see any happy ending ahead of it, because it's Changmin that really matters the most and you will kill yourself before you ruin one of the happiest days in his life.

"You're the best leader, the best friend I've ever had," Changmin chuckles, who knows which memories are reeling inside his head. "And now you're going to be my--"

A knock on the cottage door yanks you both back to reality. Changmin's biting his lip, a habit of nervousness he can't seem to shake off. But when he turns at you he's smiling tenderly again.

"We should go," he takes your hand, and you're torn between pulling away or taking him away.

You do neither and let him takes you.

 

_You stop and take one last longing look. Love and grieve will intertwine and there's no escaping it._

 

"...to be your husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do you part?" the priest's voice is loud against the soft ocean waves. Sometimes the pigeons fly by and you wonder how it feels to have your heads up in the clouds.

"I do," Changmin keeps his eyes steady on his husband-to-be, an overwhelming love in his eyes that you have never seen before.

"Do you take Shim Changmin, to be your husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do you part?"

"I do," you whisper, both hoping that no one will ever hear it and that Changmin hears it clearly. You want to scream it aloud before you'll need to lock it away deep in your heart, never to be opened again.

"I now pronounce you husband and husband," the priest raises his wrinkly hands, a small smile on his face.

The guests all rise from their seats and clap, the family are looking proud and tearful, the friends are whooping and cheering loudly. The sun is shining and the sky is cloudless blue, the sandy beach is a picturesque backdrop for the altar adorned with white flowers. Everything's just like how Changmin's dreamed of, you know it.

The newlyweds kiss under the wedding arch, it's picture perfect and a heavenly moment Changmin will surely cherish forever. You can't bring yourself to do so.

You cross eyes with Changmin's parents and force yourself to grin and wave. You see familiar faces from the company and force yourself to be the good and proud hyung you're supposed to be.

 

Your eyes clash with Changmin's, and then he smiles and waves at you.

 

You force a smile back, even as he turns to kiss his husband again and you're lament to acknowledge how perfect of a couple they are.

 

_You close your eyes, crossing all those memories, far away past the galaxies, still stuck as it is in the way you came from._

 

"You're crying, hyung," Changmin dabs tissue on your cheeks. You can't even compute that you're letting yourself cry in front of him.

"You're married now," you laugh to cover up the pitiful weep. You hope it doesn't sound hysterical.

"I know, crazy right?" Changmin laughs too, but it's full of joy contrasting to yours. "So now's your turn to make me your best man."

You shake your head because the idea seems insane.

"I'm serious, Yunho," Changmin tilts his head and smiles knowingly, "You're a great man. You'll find the love of your life."

How he doesn't know that you've already found it a long time ago. How he doesn't know your heart keeps beating even while yearning for the love you'll never get.

 

How he doesn't know you're losing the love of your life for good today.

 

Changmin perks up at hearing his husband--you loathe that word so much--calling him. He turns to you and gives you one last bear hug.

"You're the best, hyung," Changmin whispers. As he pulls back, you slowly feel the dread settling in on you.

"Changmin-ah," you croak his name like a prayer.

 

"I'll see you around," Changmin pats your cheeks and walks away, far far away.

 

 

"I love you," you didn't say.

 

 

_Even if it's only in your dreams, you wish to see him._

_One of these nights._

 

**Author's Note:**

> First written & Finished: 17-March-2016
> 
> Comments are ♥
> 
> Find me on twitter @ lunnashh
> 
> /RUNS FURTHER AWAY/ IM SRY GUYZ U KNOW HOMIN-CHAN IS ETERNAL LOVE :") also im sorry for not giving any tags/warning bcs I want to know how readers react (esp for angst) .....forgive me....


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